I’m living the nightmare that everyone has. You know the one I’m talking about. It’s the one where you’re back in grammar school and the teacher starts handing out test papers and you did’t study because you didn’t know there was going to be a damn test.
Six years ago I published my first novel. Back then it was a mortal sin to self publish. At the time, I was good at mortal sins so I figured self publishing was for me. Now, everyone I talk to is writing and self publishing a book. And forget traditional, in-your-hand books. Everyone is creating e books and selling them for 99 cents. What’s that all about? And why didn’t I get that memo? I’m still working on getting my words onto paper. When were they going to tell me that's not done anymore?
Oh, and when were they going to tell me about social networking? I didn’t know it’s a must to have 40,000 Twitter followers. How do you get 40,000 followers and what do you do with them, once you get them? It reminds me of the movie Sergeant York with Gary Cooper, where he captures hundreds of German prisoners and no one knows what to do with them.
Okay, so here’s the deal. In the future, should a radical change take place in the publishing industry, I would appreciate someone letting me know. Send the memo. Please?